I admit I’m not the social animal I would have to be to work in meatspace retail. But then a lot of the people B&N/Borders hires seem to have even more social anxiety than I do. And yeah, I’m sure a lot of those sad losers are aspiring writers wanting to stay close to the publishing industry, while they spend their off hours wearing their fursuits and writing real person furry slash on IRC. I don’t exactly miss the face-to-face experience I would otherwise have to endure when I shop online.

As for writer’s block, I am celebrating my 19th year of NOT WRITING: I graduated from a locally prestigious fiction writing program at a locally prestigious university in 1988, and haven’t written a word of fiction (though the tech support department where I work might disagree with that) since graduating because after that I sort of fell into technical writing and never got around to writing anything “artistic”.

My real life writing actually pays pretty handsomely, it’s steady work, I don’t have to go to book signings, my name isn’t anywhere on or in the books I write, I don’t have to write anything on spec or deal with submissions and rejection, and the rabble, when they find out what I do for a living, actually admit they couldn’t imagine being able to do what I do.

I’ve seen it over and over, and that’s why I’ve stopped feeling sorry for brick-and-mortar bookstores. The moment a guy walks up to the shelves at Starbucks and starts masturbating on the merchandise, the staff demands that he leave or calls the cops. You don’t see a comparable “Vacuumtard” hanging out at the Oreck dealership because he’ll be asked to buy something or leave. However, big stores and small not only won’t get rid of the parasites that drive off the paying customers with personality or odor, but they set up chairs and tables to encourage the fuckers to spend the entire day there. Can you think of any retail business, anywhere, other than bookselling that thinks that letting the local retirees move in, scream at customers, and camp out for eight and ten hours with a stack of merchandise at their feet is a good business model?

We debated going to Borders instead (opened a couple years after B&N about two miles away, was busy as hell for the first few weeks and then just kinda stagnated) and realized the same weirdos would be there too, including, literally, The Booktard. The fact that Borders manages to completely rearrange the entire store just before each time I visit kinda annoys me too. I think it’s a ploy to disguise the shrinking inventory – the aisles get wider as well, so I think they’re removing entire sections of shelves when nobody’s looking. But the thought was too depressing so we went home and I ordered a bunch of stuff from Amazon.

Paul, you set the bar pretty high.

http://boston.stockgroup.com/sn_newsreleases.asp?symbol=BGP&newsid=8946282