101 Reasons to Stop Writing

May is International Slushpile Awareness Month

 
This Month's Demotivator:

August 28: On This Day …

  • 1749 — German poet, scientist, Renaissance Man and author of the best version of one of the most ripped-off stories of all time, Johann Wolfgang von Goethe was born. His scientific and philosophic writings had a profound effect on 19th Century thought. You will never be this good.
  • 1814 — Gothic writer Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu was born. His short story “Carmilla” established what would become the cliché of the lesbian vampire, providing the excuse for most of the frontal nudity in horror movies. All the best vampire writers are 19th Century Irishmen. You can stop writing lesbian vampire stories now.
  • 1828 — Russian author, literary and literal giant Leo Tolstoy was born, and promptly started work on the first draft of War and Peace. What’s Russian for “You will never be this good” ?
  • 1961 — The Marvellettes hit #1 on the Billboard charts with their upbeat tune about waiting patiently for a publisher’s acceptance letter, “Please Mr. Postman“.
  • 1963 — Martin Luther King, Jr. delivered his “I Have a Dream” speech at a civil rights rally in Washington DC. There was a three month window of optimism for social change before JFK got shot. You will never be this good, which is why you should stop writing and do something meaningful with your life.
  • 1995 — German author Michael Ende discovered that the clever title for his most famous work, The Neverending Story, would not magically prevent him from stopping writing, the hard way.

 

3 Comments

  1. Wolf:

    Inspiring and true. Save that my countryfolk Goethe indeed wrote the biggest rip-off in history, though it wasn’t Faust (which he “borrowed” from a Christopher Marlowe adaption), but “Werther”:

    http://die-leiden-des-jungen-werther.de

    Now I shall have to come back periodically to see who answered to a flash version of a classic novel - but being such a smart-ass is worth it.

    Keep the good work up,
    Wolf

  2. I wasn’t familiar with The Sorrows of Young Werther (English translation), though apparently it was a massive hit at the time, and apparently it was based on his own unrequited love. From whom did he rip it off, if not his younger, unrequited self?

  3. Wolf:

    Oops… Did I express that Goethe ripped the story - instead of that every writing John D. ripped something out of Werther…?

    The Hamburger Edition (nothing to do with the food…) says that Goethe wrote somewhat too closely along really existing persons; the girl’s fiancé cancelled his friendship for being the baddie in Germany’s first bestseller. If you might call this a form of ripping…

    And welcome to my blogroll :)

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If a young writer can refrain from writing, he shouldn't hesitate to do so.
Andre Gide
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