101 Reasons to Stop Writing

• Seven minutes. Nathan said No.
• All my submissions come back ‘Address Unknown’ in a week or so.
• I send a ‘Fsck You!’ postcard after three months.
• I waited five years, only to be told religious thrillers were out now.
• A year is normal, right?
• I’ve never submitted anything. I’m still preparing my whiny complaints.
• I went to the agent’s funeral to ask his widow if he’d gotten around to it.
• No matter how long I wait, when I call to ask I get a ‘No’ straightaway.
• You mean since the first submission, or since the last updated draft?
• I’d sent them nineteen more stories before I got the first one back.

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